Passover to Yom Hashoa .... and the last of this year's really bad Passover jokes
04/16/2014 09:53:16 PM
MISHEBEYRACHS this week ....
" Our prayers, thoughts, and well wishes go out to community members in need":
If you'd like to help or need help, or would like to be added to this list, please contact Lori Becker. BK's Hesed Committee is here to help
Sign up to read names for BK's annual Yom Hashoa Rememberance/Name Reading (More information below)
Truly Awful Passover Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Cry
1. A group of leading medical researchers has published data indicating that Seder participants should NOT partake of both chopped liver and charoses. It seems that this combination can lead to Charoses of the Liver.
2. JEWISH JEOPARDY: We give the answer, you give the question:
A: Sofer
Q: On what do Jews recline on Passover?
A: Babylon
Q: What does the rabbi do during some sermons?
3. At our seder, we had whole wheat and bran matzoh, fortified with Metamucil. The brand name, of course, is…”Let My People Go.
Thursday, April 17: Chol Hamoed Passover (Nisan 17)
8:00a BK at Habitat for Humanity
Erev Shabbat, April 18: Chol Hamoed Passover (Nisan 18)
7:30a Morning Minyan
Download/Read this week's Shabbat flyer
Shabbat, April 19: Chol Hamoed Passover, (Nisan 19)
9:00a NO BET MIDRASH
10:00a Shacharit
4:00p Jewish Meditation Center of Montclair
Monday, April 21: Passover (Nisan 21)
5:30p NO BET MIDRASH (6th, 7th, Teens)
Tuesday, April 22: Passover (Nisan 22)
7:30p Passover Yizkor Service, Chametz and a Mourner’s Table
Rabbi Elliott is inviting those in mourning and those who have recently been in mourning to gather informally after the service. Rabbi Elliott will be sharing a short teaching and then opening up the room for sharing of memories and current experiences with mourning.
1:00p Lunch & Learn
4:15p NO BET MIDRASH
7:30a Morning Minyan
Shabbat, April 26: Kedoshim (Nisan 26)
9:00a Torah Through the Eyes of the Rabbis
9:00a NO BET MIDRASH
10:00a Shacharit
10:00a Antonia Ramos Bat Mitzvah
12:45p Conversational Hebrew - MEDABRIM IM NIM and CHAVAYA IM AYA!
4:00p Jewish Meditation Center of Montclair
Sunday, April 27 (Nisan 27)
5:00p Sacred Chanting Circle
7:00p Yom Hashoa Community Service
8:30p Yom Hashoa Remembrance / Name ReadingImmediately following the Community Service, all are invited to walk down the block to Bnai Keshet, 99 S. Fullerton Avenue, where volunteers will read aloud names of victims through the night and into the next day, concluding at 6:30pm Monday evening. (There may be a pause in reading during overnight hours, depending on sign-ups).
While Jews were persecuted during this time in history, it is important to remember that gays and lesbians, as well as individuals with disabilities, were also targeted. Lists of names representing these groups will also be available for reading aloud.
Any and all are welcome and encouraged to honor the memories of those who suffered. Sign up below or just come to pay respects. You may bring names of family members to read aloud, or share personal artifacts.
Billy and the Stop Shopping Choir
Friday, May 9, 2014 • 9 Iyyar 5774
6:30 PM - 10:00 PMFirst Congregational Church 40 South Fullerton Avenue Montclair, New Jersey 07042
Bnai Keshet & the First Congregational Church are co-sponsoring this event, and we will join with our friends at First Congregational Church at 6:30 p.m. for a dairy/meatless pot-luck dinner. Put on your calendar now -- details to follow.
